Saturday, August 22, 2009

Christmas in August

I've been thinking so much about Christmas lately. Planning already. Trying to sort out how I can make it a good time instead of the horrid time it was last year.

For so many years now I've had a hard time dealing with Christmas, the stress of it always causing depression. I hate all the pressures that come with it, all the traditions that need to be lived up to. My life is busy enough as it is, without Christmas. Just can't deal with all the extra time and energy Christmas requires.

And yet I believe in celebrating the idyllic Christmas. I want that. Perhaps I'm expecting too much from myself to make it that way?

Anyway, I'm preparing for it now, hoping that I will sidestep problems when the holiday time is truly upon me.

How can I celebrate Christmas this year, without bringing on the depression tha comes along with it? Those thoughts are with me all the time now-a-days. I'm making plans.

I've started my Christmas shopping (though only one item so far). And I'm making notecards and other photographic items, planning to have an open house near Christmas when I can show them off and have them available for sale. I'll probably do that towards the end of November. The proceeds from the sale will support a church ministry.

Making the notecards is something I'm very much enjoying. It's a wonderful creative exercise, an outlet I really need. Something to distract me from the mental health work that tends to consume me. A healthy hobby.

I'll be making most of my gifts. If there weren't a Christmas time I wouldn't have as good a reason to be creative would I? And isn't Christmas all about being creative? The baking, the cooking, the decorating, the entertaining.

Christmas. I will look to the positive in it. I will look forward to and plan the good. Starting now. Little by little.

6 comments:

sbwrites said...

Dear Marja,
Last year around the holidays, I finally told my husband that we could no longer spend Christmas with a relative of his who makes us all feel bad.

But, the holidays were still awful. What I just figured out was that while I'd finally ended a relationship that made me sick, I hadn't figured out a new way to spend the holidays with people we love, and to come up with a new way to celebrate that is low-key, spiritually enriching, and joyful.

So...that's my goal this year!

Susan

marja said...

Hi Susan,

So tough, isn't it? Christmas has become so important to us. It needs to live up to what we envision it should be, and it's so hard to get to that.

Do you think I'm crazy to start planning already? I just so don't want to be depressed again this year. I'm hoping to avoid it and am doing all I can, starting now. Think I'm crazy?

I'm not dreading it this year as I usually do, trying to look to it with a positive attitude. Think it will work?

Guess I'm sounding a little anxious, eh?

marja

sbwrites said...

Dear Marja,
No, I don't think you're crazy, and I also don't think that planning in advance necessarily means you're anxious either.

Personally, I think that if you want to change something significantly so that it makes you feel well rather than depressed, it takes a lot of planning. And you're doing that. So, it's a good thing!

Susan

marja said...

Susan,

I just want to work up to a happy, positive experience. A looking forward to instead of dreading. A planning of good things. We'll see how it works.

marja

Nancie said...

Dear Marja,

I used to find preparing for Christmas a very stressful thing too. I am too much of a perfectionist and tend to go to great length to buy presents, etc for many people.

Glad you are making plans to cope better this year. It will be helpful to look for the positive in it, to break big projects into small ones and to work on it by and by. May God bless and guide you each step of the way. I am praying for you.

Missed you so. Take care.

With love and prayers,
Nancie

marja said...

Hi Nancie,

I miss you too. Haven't been doing nearly as much blogging as I used to. We'll have to support each other with our Christmas plans...if we could, somehow. It will be interesting to see how the planning will help me. So much is a question of attitude, isn't it?

Love, marja