A couple of weeks ago I told you about the Bible study Living Room would be starting today, John Ortberg's "If you want to walk on water you've got to get out of the boat." It's based on the story of Peter, leaving the boat in the midst of a storm, walking to Jesus.
There were six of us at this first session. More people will be joining us in the future.
I've been so looking forward to this study, knowing I needed it to help me rebuild my trust in God. Knowing I needed some spiritual food. My friend Helen is facilitating and she is an excellent teacher, a spirit-led person. Her influence has been a big part of my growth, ever since I first started going to her studies and since she became my friend and mentor.
I've been praying a lot over this study, believing that God would answer, that he would help me rebuild my strength with its help.
God did not let me down. By chewing with the other participants on what it meant to leave our boat and what it meant to focus on Jesus and trust in him, I do feel strengthened and encouraged.
After today's lesson I can see that I've been focusing too much on my troubles, my illness, my waves. I've been focusing on those instead of on Jesus and the work God has given me to do. And when you focus on the waves instead of on Jesus, you tend to sink - you start thinking of what's within your own power instead of what's within God's power.
Tonight I feel bright awake - alive. What a wonderful feeling!
Showing posts with label walking on water.. Show all posts
Showing posts with label walking on water.. Show all posts
Friday, June 19, 2009
Sunday, May 24, 2009
To live with hope
I haven't found the stability that I had hoped for. Am once more on a downward spiral and it gets quite tiresome. Every time I find some hope, I fall down again. One step forward and two steps back.
And although I know my problem is medical, I also know that spiritually I'm not in a good place.
The beginning of Living Room and the growth of it was God's doing. All I had to do was to be God's voice, hands and feet. I was just a little foot soldier, following along. And that's what made it successful. The sense of failure I now have I can tell is simply because I'm looking at Living Room as "my" work and not "God's" work. I feel I'm not wise enough or strong enough to carry it. If I were in the right place spiritually, I would not feel this way. I would rest in God. I would let Him do His thing and follow along - trusting.
I pray today that I will learn to trust God more. I pray that I would look to God for strength and not to myself.
On June 19th we're starting a Bible study for Living Roomers called, "If you want to walk on water you've got to get out of the boat." Peter got out of the boat to walk to Jesus. But when he took his eyes off Jesus and looked at the waves, he began to sink. He thought in terms of what "he" was capable of on his own. He looked to himself.
I've been taking my eyes off Jesus. Looking at my own lack of wisdom and strength, as though that's what it's about - as though that's what I had to depend on. Yet that's not what it's about at all. It's not about me and what I can do. It's all about God and what God can do. I can do nothing without God.
And although I know my problem is medical, I also know that spiritually I'm not in a good place.
The beginning of Living Room and the growth of it was God's doing. All I had to do was to be God's voice, hands and feet. I was just a little foot soldier, following along. And that's what made it successful. The sense of failure I now have I can tell is simply because I'm looking at Living Room as "my" work and not "God's" work. I feel I'm not wise enough or strong enough to carry it. If I were in the right place spiritually, I would not feel this way. I would rest in God. I would let Him do His thing and follow along - trusting.
I pray today that I will learn to trust God more. I pray that I would look to God for strength and not to myself.
On June 19th we're starting a Bible study for Living Roomers called, "If you want to walk on water you've got to get out of the boat." Peter got out of the boat to walk to Jesus. But when he took his eyes off Jesus and looked at the waves, he began to sink. He thought in terms of what "he" was capable of on his own. He looked to himself.
I've been taking my eyes off Jesus. Looking at my own lack of wisdom and strength, as though that's what it's about - as though that's what I had to depend on. Yet that's not what it's about at all. It's not about me and what I can do. It's all about God and what God can do. I can do nothing without God.
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