Monday, May 12, 2008

Beer and a pickup truck

And you all thought I was a prim and proper old church lady in her sixties, did you? I was just thinking tonight about how I probably wouldn't at all fit the image you might have of me.

My son has the car for a couple of weeks and I'm driving our silver pickup truck. Just learned to drive it. Sitting high and driving that powerful (more powerful than the car) machine makes me feel pretty tough. I'm a truckin' old woman, I am. Actually, that's all wrong. I'm NOT old at all. I actually feel around forty, even if I was born in 1946.

And here I am, drinking a beer from my husband's huge glass mug. Have come to like a beer now and then. It quenches my thirst and feeds the hunger at the same time.

My husband has gone off on a trip to Greece and I'm free to do what I wish. No cooking if I don't feel like it. This is a holiday. Amazing how much more free time you have when there's no one around to distract you!

Actually, though, this afternoon I started feeling somewhat lonely. Felt like talking to someone - because I like to talk a lot. My poor friends know all about that. I call two of them almost daily and email them and others almost non-stop. Thing is, my memory is poor, and what if I were to forget to tell them something? So I email as soon as a thought comes to me that I want to share. My poor pastor is one of the recipients. Guess I should feel guilty, and I do sometimes. But most of the time now I feel that they know me well enough. They know I need to do these things. I have a lot of thoughts that have to go somewhere.

While my husband is gone I'm planning to contact old friends that I haven't talked to for a long time. This is a good opportunity and I will feel less lonely.

Another thing I battled with this afternoon was that I felt restless, longing for interesting things to happen. I don't like to get bored and if nothing interesting is happening in my life, I make it happen. I'm a firm believer that it's within our power to make our lives as interesting as we want them to be. Just takes some imagination, motivation, and courage.

Trouble is, there are a lot of boring things in this house that need to get done, like cleaning up mountains of clutter. And that's another thing I was planning to do while my husband is gone...if I can make myself. But now - one hour before bedtime - I will settle down with my beer and read a good book.

Thanks for listening to my jabber. I had to talk to somebody.


bipolar_girl said...

Way to go, Marja! Enjoy the beer and don't get drunk!haha.Love you

marja said...

Hey, Desiree! So good to have you visit. So good to read your voice. Don't stay away so long the next time, eh?

Coco said...

No cooking if you don't want to!! Yay! :)

Nancie said...

"I have a lot of thoughts that have to go somewhere."

I am familiar with that :-) Writing emails and blogging helps me with my thoughts. I love to communicate too. As few friends can find time to read my emails, I am writing mostly on my blog. And as you can see, the moment I am a little better, I start to write again :-)

Thanks again for all your prayers and encouragements. I am better and learning to pace myself more moderately, and rely upon God's strength daily.

Good of you to have time for yourself. Take care and have a blessed day!

Bipolar Wellness Writer said...

Dear Marja,
A beer-drinking trucker changes every perception I had of you--in a good way! (smiling face).

You always seem to need company when Wes is away, so it's probably a good idea to set up as many lunches, dinners, or walks with friends as possible!

I'd be outside with friends rather than inside cleaning the house. But that's just me!


Merelyme said...

awww you are just so darn cute. i have felt this way many times...not feeling sure of what to do with myself. blogging is a good outlet.

Jena said...

Oh Marja, you are so fun! I love that you are just able to rest where you are at with what you have to work with. Making the most of every situation is something you seem to be very good at. I will never get tired of that beautiful quality of yours! Keep having fun, but don't do anything I wouldn't do... lol ... ;)

marja said...

Hey, thank you all for keeping me in such good company! Good to know you're all there. And it was kind of fun not to be so serious for a let you see I can be pretty wacko as well.