Tuesday, November 18, 2008

A wonderful phenomenon

Just a quick little post before I get the day rolling - as roll it must. I have lots I need to do.

I woke up this morning in true depressed form, feeling awash with negative thoughts and bad feelings. Can't help it, can you, when you're in the midst of depression? And how you become turned inward, even self-centered, forgetting the good things - focussing instead on the "poor me!"

But I have a friend who is going through great physical health problems right now. A couple of days ago, when I realized that, I saw how I needed to support her and help her. I had been looking for support from her for "poor me." I had failed to see her great needs, so focussed was I on "poor me."

Awful how depression can make you so self-centered. Though it's the nature of depression and I can't truly help it, it makes me feel ashamed too.

I've decided to support this friend by making some meals for her, helping her get some good food into her. People with physical health problems need our support and care every bit as much as those with mental health difficulties. They need to feel God's love in the same way. Perhaps the love and care I show her will encourage her appetite, encourage her to become better nourished. I hope and pray so.

And, you know, the wonderful phenomenon of thinking about my friend's needs is that I'm thinking less about my own needs and am feeling more positive about the day. The bad feelings leave me when I think of how I want to cook a nice meal for her today and bake some fudge brownies.

I know the depression is still with me, because I made this decision to help her a couple of days ago, but still wake up awash in bad feelings. Still have trouble tending to the big messes in my life and paying the bills. I've been on a roller coaster ride for over a month now and have decided to see my psychiatrist. Have an appointment for Thursday. Maybe I need a med change.

3 comments:

Wellness Writer said...

Dear Marja,
Good for you. Yes, depressive episodes are so self-absorbing. While I don't feel like being with people, I am interested in being with animals so I plan on volunteering in the next few days at a local rescue organization.

I've written about it in my blog, but I haven't been able to "do it." But you're right. It's ever more important to get out and about helping others.

Susan

marja said...

Hi Susan,

Of all the various coping techniques available to us, being there for others must be THE most important one. It is for me anyway.

All the other things you do with a focus on yourself. But reaching out to others is so important - not just to receive, but especially to give. Because it's in the giving that we receive.

You, Susan, must be familiar with that good feeling that comes from giving when you've written a blog post that you know will be helpful to others.

Yes, I hope you'll go volunteer with the animals, sharing your love with them. You will be blessed in return.

P.J. said...

Hi Marja,

I agree that doing things for others while we are depressed makes a world of difference. It takes the focus off of us - and isn't that what the Bible teaches?? I get so much joy out of helping others that it can't help but to boost my mood. But, it has to be a daily concious effort.

I hope your appointment went well today. I look forward to hearing about it.

You are in my prayers. Love and hugs to you!!