Further gleanings from Don Miller's Blue Like Jazz:
Miller says, "...I have come to understand that strength, inner strength, comes from receiving love as much as it comes from giving it. I think apart from the idea that I am a sinner and God forgives me, this is the greatest lesson I have ever learned. When you get it, it changes you." He says that this is the key to happiness. And, "God's love will never change us if we don't accept it."
This is so true. In my own life I've experienced the kind of happiness truly experiencing God's love - truly owning it - brings.
Trouble is, there are many Christians who have a strong faith, believing in God, believing that God's love is unconditional and immeasurable, yet unable to "feel" that love. This is especially true during times of depression. Being able to receive love is the key to living a fully happy life.
How can we help people fully realize God's great love for them? How can we help people own that for themselves? How can we help people feel God's love?
That's probably my biggest goal at Living Room: to help people learn to experience God's love. Because I know that when they do, they will find healing.
Showing posts with label love; life; God. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love; life; God. Show all posts
Thursday, June 05, 2008
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Experiencing God's love
I'm reading a wonderful book, Blue Like Jazz, by Donald Miller. The subtitle is "Nonreligious Thoughts on Christian Spirituality. Such a revolutionary, honest piece of writing! Such a refreshing look at the Christian faith.
Miller quotes a friend who said, "...to be in a relationship with God is to be loved purely and furiously. And a person who thinks himself unlovable cannot be in a relationship with God because he can't accept who God is; a Being that is love. We learn that we are lovable or unlovable from other people. That is why God tells us so many times to love each other."
I've often told the story of how a person who I regarded very highly told me she loved me and would always love me, no matter what I do or say. She told me this at a time I was deeply depressed and did not think much of myself. This had such a huge impact on me. Through this friend I came to know how much God loved me. I remember the following days well. I bathed in the knowledge of that love - I savoured it - the feeling was one of great joy, holy joy.
We need to love each other. The best prayer I know is this: "Please, God, fill me with your love and help me share that love with others."
It's through you and me that people will come to fully understand God's love.
Miller quotes a friend who said, "...to be in a relationship with God is to be loved purely and furiously. And a person who thinks himself unlovable cannot be in a relationship with God because he can't accept who God is; a Being that is love. We learn that we are lovable or unlovable from other people. That is why God tells us so many times to love each other."
I've often told the story of how a person who I regarded very highly told me she loved me and would always love me, no matter what I do or say. She told me this at a time I was deeply depressed and did not think much of myself. This had such a huge impact on me. Through this friend I came to know how much God loved me. I remember the following days well. I bathed in the knowledge of that love - I savoured it - the feeling was one of great joy, holy joy.
We need to love each other. The best prayer I know is this: "Please, God, fill me with your love and help me share that love with others."
It's through you and me that people will come to fully understand God's love.
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Blogging to heal
Ohh, do I ever need to blog - to share with you some of the stuff I'm going through! But first I need to thank all of you who were so kind in sending your condolences when my mom-in-law died. I truly appreciated your thoughts.
I coped fine with everything until the day after the funeral. Then I found out that my best friend will be away for the months of March and April. This is someone I love very much, a kindred spirit, someone I talk to almost every day....and yes, someone I'm probably far too attached to. For the past few days I've spent much of my time in tears.
I guess spending most of three weeks at my mother-in-law's bedside as she lay dying took a toll on me, even though I thought I was handling it okay. Now my emotions are raw. I don't know what I'm most sad about, my mom-in-law's death or my friend's leaving. Can't distinguish. I just feel terribly sad.
I guess this is what grief is. Now I just hope that this grief does not turn into depression. I can't get depressed, especially while the support of my good friend is not here for me. Especially when there is so much I need to do. I'm going to do my darndest to not get depressed. Tomorrow I'm seeing a counselor, someone I've never seen before. I hope she'll be able to help me. I hope I'll like her. I hope she's good.
The sermon at church today was about love. One thing Pastor Don talked about was how great the love of God is. He talked about the "scandalous love of a father", the father of the prodigal son. The father welcomes the son back so eagerly, even running to meet him - something grown men at that time never did. (running would mean having to lift your clothing and showing your bare legs!) In spite of how the son had turned his back on him, the father threw an extravagant party for him. How much that father loved him and how it must have hurt him when this son first left! How he must have missed this son! The father in the story is meant to portray God and gives a good picture of just how great God's love for us is.
And when I think of the terrible pain I'm feeling right now, I can see the pain God must feel when he loses one of us. God understands the kind of pain I'm feeling now.
I coped fine with everything until the day after the funeral. Then I found out that my best friend will be away for the months of March and April. This is someone I love very much, a kindred spirit, someone I talk to almost every day....and yes, someone I'm probably far too attached to. For the past few days I've spent much of my time in tears.
I guess spending most of three weeks at my mother-in-law's bedside as she lay dying took a toll on me, even though I thought I was handling it okay. Now my emotions are raw. I don't know what I'm most sad about, my mom-in-law's death or my friend's leaving. Can't distinguish. I just feel terribly sad.
I guess this is what grief is. Now I just hope that this grief does not turn into depression. I can't get depressed, especially while the support of my good friend is not here for me. Especially when there is so much I need to do. I'm going to do my darndest to not get depressed. Tomorrow I'm seeing a counselor, someone I've never seen before. I hope she'll be able to help me. I hope I'll like her. I hope she's good.
The sermon at church today was about love. One thing Pastor Don talked about was how great the love of God is. He talked about the "scandalous love of a father", the father of the prodigal son. The father welcomes the son back so eagerly, even running to meet him - something grown men at that time never did. (running would mean having to lift your clothing and showing your bare legs!) In spite of how the son had turned his back on him, the father threw an extravagant party for him. How much that father loved him and how it must have hurt him when this son first left! How he must have missed this son! The father in the story is meant to portray God and gives a good picture of just how great God's love for us is.
And when I think of the terrible pain I'm feeling right now, I can see the pain God must feel when he loses one of us. God understands the kind of pain I'm feeling now.
Wednesday, January 09, 2008
What feeds you?
At Living Room this Friday we're going to discuss what activities feed us and what activities drain us. When I think of what feeds me most, giving me joy, peace, energy, and satisfaction, I can see how important God's commandments are to my day-to-day life. God's commandment to love God, love others, and love ourselves are not merely given to us because it's a good thing to do or because we need to do it to please God. God gave us these commandments because he cares for us and wants the best for us. It's not just good for God - it's good for us.
I've learned that when I do things that flow out of love I receive feelings of joy and satisfaction. When I do things simply because I think I should, because they're a chore, I get dragged down - drained of energy and joy.
Jesus said to the Samaritan woman at the well, "Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." John 4:13-14. Jesus referred to this spiritual water as "living water."
I've always sort of known what he meant by "living water," but was never able to quite define it to myself in words. But in the meditating I've been doing lately, I think I've come up with what he meant: God's love flows into us and then flows out from us to others - never lying still or becoming stagnant - always flowing. In the receiving and giving it quenches our thirst; it feeds us; it produces an abundant life. This is the Holy Spirit living within us, helping us to be the kind of people God wants us to be and helping us live the kind of lives that will be fulfilling.
For me, supporting people with mood disorders, both in bloggerland and in the world around me, feeds me tremendously. It gives me great joy. Cleaning house when I'm expecting friends over is okay too, especially if I listen to some good music while doing it. But when I have to dust, vacuum, and clean the bathrooms simply because "I should," that's draining - it's a drag.
So...What activities feed you? And what activities drain you? Where do you find most joy and fulfillment?
I've learned that when I do things that flow out of love I receive feelings of joy and satisfaction. When I do things simply because I think I should, because they're a chore, I get dragged down - drained of energy and joy.
Jesus said to the Samaritan woman at the well, "Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." John 4:13-14. Jesus referred to this spiritual water as "living water."
I've always sort of known what he meant by "living water," but was never able to quite define it to myself in words. But in the meditating I've been doing lately, I think I've come up with what he meant: God's love flows into us and then flows out from us to others - never lying still or becoming stagnant - always flowing. In the receiving and giving it quenches our thirst; it feeds us; it produces an abundant life. This is the Holy Spirit living within us, helping us to be the kind of people God wants us to be and helping us live the kind of lives that will be fulfilling.
For me, supporting people with mood disorders, both in bloggerland and in the world around me, feeds me tremendously. It gives me great joy. Cleaning house when I'm expecting friends over is okay too, especially if I listen to some good music while doing it. But when I have to dust, vacuum, and clean the bathrooms simply because "I should," that's draining - it's a drag.
So...What activities feed you? And what activities drain you? Where do you find most joy and fulfillment?
Friday, January 04, 2008
Life's flow
Over the next two months our church is going to be studying a book called Emotionally Healthy Spirituality by Peter Scazzero. His view is that "it's impossible to be spiritually mature, while remaining emotionally immature." There will be several small home groups working on it and the sermons will, indirectly, deal with it.
One of the things this book states is that we need to balance our life between contemplation (being with God) and activity. Most of us are high on activity but very low on contemplation.
As I meditated on this, I struggled, wondering how much time I spent doing frenetic activity, especially the writing about mental health issues and trying to spread the Living Room concept, sometimes forgetting why I was doing it. Sometimes I get so caught up in the busyness of it all and forget the people I'm doing it for.
I concluded that my life needs flow out of love - love for God, for people, and for myself as well. This kind of love was Christ's major commandment. If more of my activity was permeated with this, I would be fulfilling God's purposes. I would be doing it all for the right reason. I would be living in God's presence.
I've slowed down on my mental health work - needed to in order to make room for Christmas in my life. Besides, I was struggling with mild bouts of depression. Now I've been feeling guilty that I'm not following through on some of this work. But I feel I need some rest, I feel I need to be prompted by the right reasons. I will know when it's time to get busy on it again. I'll have that urge that tells me action needs to be taken - action that can't wait. Then I will obey the call.
In the meantime I will obey what I currently feel called to do: clean up a messy room in my house and make a studio out of it for myself - a place to play. I will also spend time being with the people I love. My life needs to flow out of love.
One of the things this book states is that we need to balance our life between contemplation (being with God) and activity. Most of us are high on activity but very low on contemplation.
As I meditated on this, I struggled, wondering how much time I spent doing frenetic activity, especially the writing about mental health issues and trying to spread the Living Room concept, sometimes forgetting why I was doing it. Sometimes I get so caught up in the busyness of it all and forget the people I'm doing it for.
I concluded that my life needs flow out of love - love for God, for people, and for myself as well. This kind of love was Christ's major commandment. If more of my activity was permeated with this, I would be fulfilling God's purposes. I would be doing it all for the right reason. I would be living in God's presence.
I've slowed down on my mental health work - needed to in order to make room for Christmas in my life. Besides, I was struggling with mild bouts of depression. Now I've been feeling guilty that I'm not following through on some of this work. But I feel I need some rest, I feel I need to be prompted by the right reasons. I will know when it's time to get busy on it again. I'll have that urge that tells me action needs to be taken - action that can't wait. Then I will obey the call.
In the meantime I will obey what I currently feel called to do: clean up a messy room in my house and make a studio out of it for myself - a place to play. I will also spend time being with the people I love. My life needs to flow out of love.
Sunday, December 16, 2007
In the midst of the chaos
Mother's doctor called on Friday to take her in for another try at a transfusion. Unfortunately I was at Living Room and we missed the call. So yesterday we ended up having her picked up by ambulance and taken to the ER for the transfusion. It was the only way we seemed to be able to get it done. The regular department of the hospital who handles them did not return my repeated calls to them when I tried to set up an appointment. Poor woman ended up spending the night in that hectic environment.
With Mom's unwellness to deal with, Christmas is more chaotic than usual. But I think I'm handling it okay. It's just difficult to get around to - or to get in the frame of mind to - do the baking I'd like to do. But tonight I will try to make my shortbread cookies.
At times like this I am happy for Living Room. Living Room offers a retreat from the world, a place to be with other people, a place where I can be myself and I don't have to pretend everything is fine when it isn't. Even as a facilitator, I feel this. There is a lot of love in our group - many hugs shared around. Everyone truly cares about each other.
On Friday there were 18 of us present. I talked about how, during my 36 years of photography, I learned how the focal point of a picture - no matter how messy, busy, or chaotic it is - is always on that which has life. If there is a person in a busy picture with many elements - even if the person is quite small - that is where the eye settles. You'll focus on the person.
If we were to look on Christmas as a picture, a busy, chaotic picture with many different elements - the card writing, the shopping, the decorating, the parties - there is one focal point where we can rest our eyes. This focal point is Jesus, the whole reason we are celebrating this holiday. If we can stay focused on him, we will be able to find peace. The busyness won't bother us so much. In the midst of the chaos is the One who gives life. He is the light of the world. He is love.
With Mom's unwellness to deal with, Christmas is more chaotic than usual. But I think I'm handling it okay. It's just difficult to get around to - or to get in the frame of mind to - do the baking I'd like to do. But tonight I will try to make my shortbread cookies.
At times like this I am happy for Living Room. Living Room offers a retreat from the world, a place to be with other people, a place where I can be myself and I don't have to pretend everything is fine when it isn't. Even as a facilitator, I feel this. There is a lot of love in our group - many hugs shared around. Everyone truly cares about each other.
On Friday there were 18 of us present. I talked about how, during my 36 years of photography, I learned how the focal point of a picture - no matter how messy, busy, or chaotic it is - is always on that which has life. If there is a person in a busy picture with many elements - even if the person is quite small - that is where the eye settles. You'll focus on the person.
If we were to look on Christmas as a picture, a busy, chaotic picture with many different elements - the card writing, the shopping, the decorating, the parties - there is one focal point where we can rest our eyes. This focal point is Jesus, the whole reason we are celebrating this holiday. If we can stay focused on him, we will be able to find peace. The busyness won't bother us so much. In the midst of the chaos is the One who gives life. He is the light of the world. He is love.
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Unconditional love
In their book, New Light on Depression, David Biebel, C.Min. and Harold Koenig, M.D. wrote, "Love - unconditional love - is the ultimate long-term antidote for depression, for at its core love is connected with faith and hope." I find this a powerful statement.
I believe that when we feel loved by our friends and by God, no matter what we do or say - and when we love others in the same way - all our emotional and spiritual needs end up being met, even if indirectly.
When we love and are loved unconditionally and non-judgmentally:
The Bible also says, "This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins." 1 John 4:10
So much of our ability to deal with depression hangs on how we give and receive love.
I believe that when we feel loved by our friends and by God, no matter what we do or say - and when we love others in the same way - all our emotional and spiritual needs end up being met, even if indirectly.
When we love and are loved unconditionally and non-judgmentally:
- we feel good about ourselves
- we feel secure
- we care enough about ourselves to want to take good care of ourselves
- we find out that it is more gratifying to give than it is to receive
- we want to do our best to make our life count for something - to do God's work
- we are able to be more forgiving
- we are encouraged in our faith in God
- faith in God leads to having faith in what he provides, including medical treatment
- faith in God leads to hope
The Bible also says, "This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins." 1 John 4:10
So much of our ability to deal with depression hangs on how we give and receive love.
Thursday, April 12, 2007
Love: the bread of life...and health
Psychiatrist Harold Koenig, in his book, New Light on Depression, wrote: "Love - unconditional love - is the ultimate long-term antidote for depression, for at its core love is connected with faith and hope."
I've liked that statement ever since I first read it. I have found out how important it is to have the love and support of my friends when I go through hard times. What I haven't always thought of is that giving love is just as important. It's when we give that we stop being victims. When we give we gather strength and renewed hope.
Love means everything to our well-being. It is the very food of life. We can withstand a lot if we know we are loved and prayed for. And if receiving love helps us survive, then giving love helps us thrive. The Bible says that God does not simply love us, he IS love. No wonder love is so important to us.
In his book, Soul Cravings, Erwin McManus writes: "Love is ever expanding. Love always grows, not just deeper, but wider. Love always loves people more and always loves more people. Love calls us to community; love calls us to humanity; love calls us to each other...It was no one less than Jesus who said the proof of God is found in our love for one another."
I've liked that statement ever since I first read it. I have found out how important it is to have the love and support of my friends when I go through hard times. What I haven't always thought of is that giving love is just as important. It's when we give that we stop being victims. When we give we gather strength and renewed hope.
Love means everything to our well-being. It is the very food of life. We can withstand a lot if we know we are loved and prayed for. And if receiving love helps us survive, then giving love helps us thrive. The Bible says that God does not simply love us, he IS love. No wonder love is so important to us.
In his book, Soul Cravings, Erwin McManus writes: "Love is ever expanding. Love always grows, not just deeper, but wider. Love always loves people more and always loves more people. Love calls us to community; love calls us to humanity; love calls us to each other...It was no one less than Jesus who said the proof of God is found in our love for one another."
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