I have something coming up at the end of this week that is not going to be the most straight forward challenge to tackle. I've been invited to speak to a group of around twenty people who have lost a loved one to suicide. They'd like to hear from me what it's like to live with a mental illness.
The thing I'm most worried about is how they will hear me. I don't know what it's like to be in their shoes. Will I be able to be sensitive to what they're dealing with?
One thing for sure is that I will encourage them to talk to me as well. As a person who has considered suicide herself, I need to hear what it might be like for the people left behind were I to die that way. Perhaps we could get a discussion going.
Thinking about it now and considering where the people in this support group are at, I can see that taking your life is a selfish thing to do. And yet, self-centeredness can't be helped when you're in the midst of depression. The pain is so great, it's hard to get past it.
What the people who I speak to can give me will be just as important as what I can give them I feel. I hope we will all be sensitive to each other. I hope understanding will grow.
Showing posts with label support group. Show all posts
Showing posts with label support group. Show all posts
Monday, September 21, 2009
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
A "Living Room" testimony
I was delighted today to receive an email from one of our Living Room support group members which she had sent to a bunch of her friends. I'll share a portion of it here:
"When I told her (a friend) about my support group for mood disorders and what a blessing it was, she asked ('and don't be offended,' she added) 'isn't that depressing to be around a bunch of crazy people?' I said, 'No way, it's a safe place to support each other in our common brokenness and to realize you're not the only one to feel this way. In that setting, I've learned that it's an invisible disease but not any different than diabetes is and to dispel the stigma and shame that's associated with mental illness. I'm learning that my condition is not a curse but could be a blessing. In my lows I get a sense of what emotional pain people can go through (especially my dad). When I'm manic I get so much accomplished and feel so inspired and creative.'
"Interesting to know that our facilitator marja bergen wrote on the same subject on her blog that I read the day before: learning to empathize with people who are so in the dark about the subject and to try to understand where they're coming from - not to be easily offended as we're trying to get them to understand us - basically having grace towards them, as others have extended grace to us.
"I encouraged (my friend) to google bp to find out more and to check out marja's blog. I think that marja's desire to dispel the stigma of our disease is rubbing off on me. In my small way I'm trying to educate others that I come across and it's amazing how when you share your vulnerabilities people often open up about themselves and about the people that are close to them that suffer from mental illness."
I am grateful to this person for sharing this with her friends, and now with my blogging pals. You have encouraged me, J.
A reminder: If you are interested in learning how to set up a faith-based Living Room support group in your church, I have manuals available to help you do this. Cost for US residents is $9.75 and for those in Canada it's $8.25. This includes postage and handling. Contact me at info@candidsbymarja.com.
"When I told her (a friend) about my support group for mood disorders and what a blessing it was, she asked ('and don't be offended,' she added) 'isn't that depressing to be around a bunch of crazy people?' I said, 'No way, it's a safe place to support each other in our common brokenness and to realize you're not the only one to feel this way. In that setting, I've learned that it's an invisible disease but not any different than diabetes is and to dispel the stigma and shame that's associated with mental illness. I'm learning that my condition is not a curse but could be a blessing. In my lows I get a sense of what emotional pain people can go through (especially my dad). When I'm manic I get so much accomplished and feel so inspired and creative.'
"Interesting to know that our facilitator marja bergen wrote on the same subject on her blog that I read the day before: learning to empathize with people who are so in the dark about the subject and to try to understand where they're coming from - not to be easily offended as we're trying to get them to understand us - basically having grace towards them, as others have extended grace to us.
"I encouraged (my friend) to google bp to find out more and to check out marja's blog. I think that marja's desire to dispel the stigma of our disease is rubbing off on me. In my small way I'm trying to educate others that I come across and it's amazing how when you share your vulnerabilities people often open up about themselves and about the people that are close to them that suffer from mental illness."
I am grateful to this person for sharing this with her friends, and now with my blogging pals. You have encouraged me, J.
A reminder: If you are interested in learning how to set up a faith-based Living Room support group in your church, I have manuals available to help you do this. Cost for US residents is $9.75 and for those in Canada it's $8.25. This includes postage and handling. Contact me at info@candidsbymarja.com.
Friday, September 07, 2007
The manuals are here!
After a lot of work, checking and re-checking, having checked by others, having them professionally edited and then beautifully printed, the two manuals are finally finished. They're sitting in open boxes in our hallway, where I can look at them as I pass and feel good about it all. I've received a lot of interest from people who want to have copies. How gratifying! And when I think of how much good this could end up doing...!
I promised to let you know the cost of these books (though they're only 20 and 24 pages, they're more than just booklets).
Creating Living Room helps people with mood disorders and church leaders learn the Living Room concept and how to set up a group. Cost: $2.50
Facilitating Living Room gives facilitators guidance and encouragement. Cost: $3.25.
Cost of postage and handling for one book or the two together is the same. Within Canada: $2.50. To the US: $4.00. That's under $10 for the two. We're only covering our costs.
If you would like to receive one or both copies, please email your name and address to me. An invoice will be included with your mailing. I'm Marja at info@candidsbymarja.com
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
Spiritual influence on our mental well-being
First of all, I want to very much thank Mel, David, Sarah (an ever so big welcome back to you) and Princess Heidi for your comments on my last post. Princess Heidi, I will come and visit your new blog soon. You're so lucky to have a dad who will help you with that.
I've been meaning for a while to draw from Harold Koenig's book, Faith & Mental Health, and share with you some of the treasures of thinking and understanding I have found there.
Koenig tells of nearly 500 studies during the twentieth century that reported statistically significant associations between religion and mental health. (478 out of 724 studies) (page 133)
He lists and explains ten ways in which religion could improve mental health. Religion:
- Promotes a positive worldview
- Helps to make sense of difficult situations
- Gives purpose and meaning
- Discourages maladaptive coping
- Enhances social support
- Promotes other-directedness
- Helps to release the need for control
- Provides and encourages forgiveness
- Encourages thankfulness
- Provides hope.
Good, non-judgmental Christian support is very important for those who suffer from mental illness. People with such illnesses need Christ-like love, so they will be encouraged in their faith - so they will benefit from their faith as described in the ten points listed above.
And I'm going to, once more, mention Living Room, the support group I facilitate. I am fortunate to have the support of my entire church. The church considers this one of its most important ministries. Many people are finding support - the kind of support only a faith-based group can offer. We are helping people put their trust in God. We are helping people have hope. Knowing this gives me joy and helps keep my own mental health strong. If this were only possible for more of those who suffer!
Christians CAN help people with mental illness. I believe they want to; they only have to know how. They need the tools. They need the understanding.
Now you're probably getting tired of hearing about this, but now that my Living Room manuals are coming out, I am on a quest to see more groups start up. If you are interested in learning how to set up a Living Room group in your church, email me at info@candidsbymarja.com. When the manuals come out, I can send you copies of a manual that explains the concept (good for pastors to see) as well as a guide for facilitators. When I get them back from the printer I will be able to let you know the cost.
Thursday, August 23, 2007
Creating living room
Those of you who have been coming to this site for a while will remember that I've been writing manuals to help people who want to set up a faith-based support group. Manual number one, which describes the Living Room support group concept, is pretty well ready to go to press. I "only" have to sort out some funding issues.
But things are looking good. In fact a Christian organization that supports people with disabilities and mental illness has expressed an interest in sending copies to a large number of pastors, with a letter promoting the idea. I am happy about this.
When you are doing work God truly wants you to do - with a positive and prayerful spirit - things do come together. ...and what a joy it is to see that happen!
Manual number two, the facilitator's guide, is also ready to go. I just haven't decided yet how to produce it. The first manual will be an attractive booklet with a glossy cover (see above). We can afford that since we will probably need to print a lot to cover the order we will get from the organization I described above. The facilitator's manual may end up in a report cover, but still with an attractive color cover.
This first manual, Creating Living Room, is for church leaders and people with mood disorders who want to know how they could set up an outreach group like this in their church. If you would like me to mail you a copy, please email me at info@candidsbymarja.com. I will let you know when it's ready and the cost. (I will only charge my cost for printing and mailing.) You may want to get the facilitator's manual at the same time.
Thursday, July 12, 2007
Amazing!
The wonders of the internet! I was googling my name tonight and found out that my latest article, Mental Disorders: the Result of Sin?, has been translated into German and Spanish by a bipolar website. This is very exciting.
The editors were thrilled with the response this article got. There were 21 comments (4 of them my own). Some interesting stuff to read. Hope you'll have a look.
I'm working on some more articles for www.canadianchristianity.com, and hope that these will also draw good interest. What a great way to get my message out to a Christian audience!
Tomorrow is a Living Room day and, as always, I look forward to our meeting. We're going to read and discuss one of our member's poem, The Cracked Vase. It's a wonderful piece about being real and has great depth. Don't know how many will come. So many are on holidays. We will set a smaller table - have a more intimate gathering.
The editors were thrilled with the response this article got. There were 21 comments (4 of them my own). Some interesting stuff to read. Hope you'll have a look.
I'm working on some more articles for www.canadianchristianity.com, and hope that these will also draw good interest. What a great way to get my message out to a Christian audience!
Tomorrow is a Living Room day and, as always, I look forward to our meeting. We're going to read and discuss one of our member's poem, The Cracked Vase. It's a wonderful piece about being real and has great depth. Don't know how many will come. So many are on holidays. We will set a smaller table - have a more intimate gathering.
Friday, June 22, 2007
A soul at peace
Things have come together. I no longer feel so dizzy and stressed. And I'm sure it's all because we had a Living Room meeting this afternoon. How therapeutic that group is for me, even if I am the leader - probably because I am the leader! I get so much out of doing this work. The feeling of joy and peace I have after meetings never ceases to amaze me.
In my small sharing group today the members talked about a lot of pain. It was intense. We felt for each other; there were tears. But at the end of the meeting we prayed and gave it all to God. I went home feeling at peace. I hope the others sensed that peace as well.
That's the beauty of faith-based support. Not only do we support each other, God is there with us. God is part of the picture. We talk about our faith and we talk about our doubts, but we all accept each other - wherever we are. No one judges. At Living Room we can be real with each other and express our joys and pains. This open sharing is healing.
I am excited about having finished the manual to help other Living Rooms get started. I know it will be a powerful tool, helping other churches see the value of such a group and showing them how to set one up. Forming a Living Room group gives churches an opportunity to respond to Christ's call to love and help people in need, people who are all too often shunned in the community. Having such a group in the church is a good way to help build understanding within its congregation. It will help make mental illness a more acceptable topic of conversation, reducing the stigma that exists.
If you are reading this and feel moved to consider such a group for your church, please let me know. For a very reasonable cost (haven't figured it out yet, but it would be under $10, just covering cost for mailing) I could forward you a copy of this twelve-page manual. It will explain all you need to know. The manual includes a letter from my pastor, testifying to the importance of Living Room in our own church's ministry. If interested, you can email me at info@candidsbymarja.com.
My next job will be to write a manual on how to be a Living Room facilitator. And after that, a booklet of sample devotionals to use at meetings.
In my small sharing group today the members talked about a lot of pain. It was intense. We felt for each other; there were tears. But at the end of the meeting we prayed and gave it all to God. I went home feeling at peace. I hope the others sensed that peace as well.
That's the beauty of faith-based support. Not only do we support each other, God is there with us. God is part of the picture. We talk about our faith and we talk about our doubts, but we all accept each other - wherever we are. No one judges. At Living Room we can be real with each other and express our joys and pains. This open sharing is healing.
I am excited about having finished the manual to help other Living Rooms get started. I know it will be a powerful tool, helping other churches see the value of such a group and showing them how to set one up. Forming a Living Room group gives churches an opportunity to respond to Christ's call to love and help people in need, people who are all too often shunned in the community. Having such a group in the church is a good way to help build understanding within its congregation. It will help make mental illness a more acceptable topic of conversation, reducing the stigma that exists.
If you are reading this and feel moved to consider such a group for your church, please let me know. For a very reasonable cost (haven't figured it out yet, but it would be under $10, just covering cost for mailing) I could forward you a copy of this twelve-page manual. It will explain all you need to know. The manual includes a letter from my pastor, testifying to the importance of Living Room in our own church's ministry. If interested, you can email me at info@candidsbymarja.com.
My next job will be to write a manual on how to be a Living Room facilitator. And after that, a booklet of sample devotionals to use at meetings.
Thursday, June 21, 2007
Is this a bipolar thing? Uggh!!
In my journal this morning I made a list of all the things I'm trying to do and am overwhelmed. What I'm trying to do should be the work of an organization, not a single person!
How did I get into all this? Is this mountain the product of a bipolar mind? I haven't been hypomanic lately. Yet I'm always ambitious; I always have dreams. These things don't change. They're part of my personality.
But I can now see I have built a very high tower - brick by brick, not realizing how high it might become or how I would manage it or how I could keep it from toppling.
The good thing is that if I can't do some of the things I've personally committed myself to no one will be hurt...too much. I can let things go. Yet it's hard not to take advantage of opportunities. Letting go of some of the ones that have come along lately would be a shame. So I'm feeling pressured.
I have finished the manual that will serve as a tool to help other Living Room groups get started. And I've been hearing that people in other communities are now showing interest in starting them up. I would like to be able to support these new groups - to be there for them. I will also have to work at writing another manual for facilitators and another with sample devotional material. With those projects and writing for the website I mentioned in my last post, I have a lot of writing to do.
It's time to make a list. Time to set priorities.
God, please let me stay well. There's too much good work to do.
How did I get into all this? Is this mountain the product of a bipolar mind? I haven't been hypomanic lately. Yet I'm always ambitious; I always have dreams. These things don't change. They're part of my personality.
But I can now see I have built a very high tower - brick by brick, not realizing how high it might become or how I would manage it or how I could keep it from toppling.
The good thing is that if I can't do some of the things I've personally committed myself to no one will be hurt...too much. I can let things go. Yet it's hard not to take advantage of opportunities. Letting go of some of the ones that have come along lately would be a shame. So I'm feeling pressured.
I have finished the manual that will serve as a tool to help other Living Room groups get started. And I've been hearing that people in other communities are now showing interest in starting them up. I would like to be able to support these new groups - to be there for them. I will also have to work at writing another manual for facilitators and another with sample devotional material. With those projects and writing for the website I mentioned in my last post, I have a lot of writing to do.
It's time to make a list. Time to set priorities.
God, please let me stay well. There's too much good work to do.
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
A dizzy soul
I'll be going to Bible study in a little while and I know that one question our facilitator told us she will be asking us to answer is, "How is your soul?" I would have to answer that it's rather dizzy right now, though it is improving. I'm beginning to settle down - more able to focus on the jobs at hand.
For such a long time my main goal in life has been to reduce the stigma toward mentally ill people within the church. For so long I have been striving to educate Christians by writing articles, promoting a pastor's mental health workshop and writing a book. But now things are coming together.
www.canadianchristianity.com has asked me to contribute regularly on the topic of mental health and the church. The more I think about it, the more I realize this is a wonderful opportunity. This is exactly where I need to be. God is good.
In May this website published my testimony. Soon they will be publishing an article I wrote a couple of years ago, Mental Illness: The Result of Sin?
Other questions we will have to be prepared to answer at Bible study this morning is, "How have you seen God at work in and through your life since we last met?" and "What God-given dream are you nurturing?" My answers to these will be easy. God has been at work leading me to fulfill my dream and it's becoming a reality - bit by bit.
And that isn't all. Another great thing is happening. Someone in Abbotsford, a town 45 minutes from here, is working to start a Living Room group in her church. This could be the beginning of my dream to see Living Room groups in many churches.
It's amazing where God leads us when we let him!
For such a long time my main goal in life has been to reduce the stigma toward mentally ill people within the church. For so long I have been striving to educate Christians by writing articles, promoting a pastor's mental health workshop and writing a book. But now things are coming together.
www.canadianchristianity.com has asked me to contribute regularly on the topic of mental health and the church. The more I think about it, the more I realize this is a wonderful opportunity. This is exactly where I need to be. God is good.
In May this website published my testimony. Soon they will be publishing an article I wrote a couple of years ago, Mental Illness: The Result of Sin?
Other questions we will have to be prepared to answer at Bible study this morning is, "How have you seen God at work in and through your life since we last met?" and "What God-given dream are you nurturing?" My answers to these will be easy. God has been at work leading me to fulfill my dream and it's becoming a reality - bit by bit.
And that isn't all. Another great thing is happening. Someone in Abbotsford, a town 45 minutes from here, is working to start a Living Room group in her church. This could be the beginning of my dream to see Living Room groups in many churches.
It's amazing where God leads us when we let him!
Friday, June 15, 2007
Depression: a disease or a state of mind?
Mel Avila Alarilla left an interesting comment on my last post - something that prompts me to discuss this further.
Yes, depression is a state of mind, but this state of mind is caused by a disease - or a disorder.
I think there's an unfortunate misunderstanding of what mental illness is. In my opinion keeping "physical" and "mental" illnesses as separate entities is a mistake. I believe that mental illness is just as much a physical problem as heart disease, asthma, or diabetis. In mental illness the organ that's affected is the brain. Physiological malfunction of this organ affects a person's thinking, emotions, and behavior. This occurs through no fault of the person who is ill. I feel the time must come that mental illness be no longer put in a separate category. It IS just another illness.
Can faith conquer depression? Faith will help us cope, as it does with other illnesses. But once a person has a disease like bipolar, depression and mania are inevitable, no matter how much faith he has. We can cling to scripture all we want and it will often help, but the depression and negative thinking and feeling that comes with it cannot be avoided. Neither can our highs with the elated feelings be avoided. This is the nature of the disease.
Mel says how his life changed when he began following Jesus. I can enthusiastically say mine did too. It's quite amazing where God has brought me and I'm very grateful. I'm sure I wouldn't be doing as well as I am now if it weren't for Jesus in my life. The church I belong to has been very supportive. Through my friends there, I've come to understand how great God's love is. The knowledge and assurance of that love does much to keep me well, secure, and with less fear than I would otherwise have. Sharing that love with others has taken me out of the victim role and made me strong.
...Yet I still get hopelessly depressed at times. It just happens. I went through two months of it only a while ago. I struggled, I prayed, and my friends prayed with me. But it had to run its course.
I must say, though, that experiencing these moods is not all bad. The suffering is misery - yes. But going through this suffering is what helps me understand others who suffer. I know a language that those who have it easy cannot understand. This language helps me connect with many people. If I didn't go through depression once in a while I might forget. I would perhaps lose the ability to have compassion.
I'm not sorry that God made me the way he did - bipolar and all. I know he did it for a reason. He has given me work to do that I can do precisely because I have this disease. And I love this work. Facilitating Living Room, the faith-based support group for people with mood disorders, is pure joy. I like to refer to the way I feel after meetings as "holy joy." There's nothing else like it. Hard to believe, I know, but true.
Saturday, May 26, 2007
A good time
Yesterday's Living Room support group was good and left me feeling happy, as all those meetings do. I spent the rest of the day savoring it. After having twenty out to our previous meeting, I decided to make a huge table, pushing five long tables together. That made room for twenty-two chairs to fit around. But only thirteen showed up - still a good turn-out though.
You won't believe this, Susan, but our topic, "Uncovering the Good in the Bad", was very much like your post about being grateful. We discussed how gratitude can affect how we feel about life and God, and how it affects our mood. Even situations that seem bad at first can eventually give us something to be thankful for if we're in the thanking habit.
In Romans 8:28 Paul said, "...we know that to those who love God, who are called according to his plan, everything that happens fits into a pattern for good."
I told the story about how I'd recently accessed my medical records from when I was in a mental hospital forty years ago. I'd suspected I had been over-medicated but wanted to be assured of all the facts, since I was writing about it in my latest book. And sure enough, the records show that I had been given excessive amounts of chlorpromazine. My mouth hung open most of the time and I could not communicate with others. There was just nothing happening in my brain. It was as though it had stalled.
The part that truly made me bitter was uncovering a letter written by my private pdoc's partner, a person who had interviewed me shortly after I was admitted. He recommended that I be discharged. My previous employer had offered to let me to try and work, in spite of my psychotic condition. This doctor suggested that I would do better in such a normal environment, rather that this mental institution.
But apparently, this letter was either ignored or not agreed with. I stayed in the hospital for another six interminable months - miserable months. I was only nineteen years old, the youngest on my ward. It was only when I read these records that I realized this letter existed and that an opportunity had been lost.
I felt stunned and bitter.
But, after a few days my thinking changed. I began to appreciate how far I had come, more than ever before. I had even more to be thankful for than I realized. God has truly done a lot for me. My records showed that the staff did not hold out much hope for me. My (incorrect) diagnosis was schizophrenia and, in those days, medications were not as effective as they are today. But did I ever show them!!
I'm a very fortunate person. And I'm sure that living in the institution in the way I did has benefited me by helping me have compassion and respect for others. I believe what Paul said. If we're in line with God's plan, "...everything that happens fits into a pattern for good." I believe my hospital experiences help me find joy in the work I do with Living Room. I like being a supporter. I'm no longer a victim.
You won't believe this, Susan, but our topic, "Uncovering the Good in the Bad", was very much like your post about being grateful. We discussed how gratitude can affect how we feel about life and God, and how it affects our mood. Even situations that seem bad at first can eventually give us something to be thankful for if we're in the thanking habit.
In Romans 8:28 Paul said, "...we know that to those who love God, who are called according to his plan, everything that happens fits into a pattern for good."
I told the story about how I'd recently accessed my medical records from when I was in a mental hospital forty years ago. I'd suspected I had been over-medicated but wanted to be assured of all the facts, since I was writing about it in my latest book. And sure enough, the records show that I had been given excessive amounts of chlorpromazine. My mouth hung open most of the time and I could not communicate with others. There was just nothing happening in my brain. It was as though it had stalled.
The part that truly made me bitter was uncovering a letter written by my private pdoc's partner, a person who had interviewed me shortly after I was admitted. He recommended that I be discharged. My previous employer had offered to let me to try and work, in spite of my psychotic condition. This doctor suggested that I would do better in such a normal environment, rather that this mental institution.
But apparently, this letter was either ignored or not agreed with. I stayed in the hospital for another six interminable months - miserable months. I was only nineteen years old, the youngest on my ward. It was only when I read these records that I realized this letter existed and that an opportunity had been lost.
I felt stunned and bitter.
But, after a few days my thinking changed. I began to appreciate how far I had come, more than ever before. I had even more to be thankful for than I realized. God has truly done a lot for me. My records showed that the staff did not hold out much hope for me. My (incorrect) diagnosis was schizophrenia and, in those days, medications were not as effective as they are today. But did I ever show them!!
I'm a very fortunate person. And I'm sure that living in the institution in the way I did has benefited me by helping me have compassion and respect for others. I believe what Paul said. If we're in line with God's plan, "...everything that happens fits into a pattern for good." I believe my hospital experiences help me find joy in the work I do with Living Room. I like being a supporter. I'm no longer a victim.
Friday, May 11, 2007
An amazing meeting
Living Room met today and the afternoon had a party atmosphere. So many of us were there. We had set up four tables joined to each other to make one huge table that will seat 18 people. My co-facilitator thought that perhaps I was overdoing it - and I kind of wondered that as well. Usually we put up three tables which will seat 16. But we ended up with 20 in attendance, an all-time record for us. We had to squeeze a couple of people in on the corners, uncomfortable for them and not something I like to do.
The two ladies who spoke at the service last Sunday told us how they had felt when they shared their story with the congregation. One told us that she had found the experience freeing. Both speakers had received a lot of affirmation after. I know that they were popular after the service ended, with many wanting to speak with them. We celebrated by bringing out a cake with sparklers on it.
Although I'm happy about the success of our support group, I also feel overwhelmed. How long can we continue doing this before it becomes unwieldy? We usually like to have some discussion based on the devotional, but had to forego that today because of lack of time. With ten people in each sharing group, there isn't a lot of time to spare.
I very much want to encourage the formation of more faith-based groups like this and will now have to do some serious work on this. The need is greater than my church and I can respond to adequately. I've decided to write a manual/guide as a tool for churches who wish to do what we have done. But to do a proper job of this I will have to try and get some funding from an organization that shares my vision. I'm working on that.
Please help me pray that I will find a way to spread the Living Room concept to other areas. People who suffer from mood disorders need to have a place where they can get support from others who share their faith in God. It is important to have a place where they discuss both: their mental health issues as well as how God works in their life.
The two ladies who spoke at the service last Sunday told us how they had felt when they shared their story with the congregation. One told us that she had found the experience freeing. Both speakers had received a lot of affirmation after. I know that they were popular after the service ended, with many wanting to speak with them. We celebrated by bringing out a cake with sparklers on it.
Although I'm happy about the success of our support group, I also feel overwhelmed. How long can we continue doing this before it becomes unwieldy? We usually like to have some discussion based on the devotional, but had to forego that today because of lack of time. With ten people in each sharing group, there isn't a lot of time to spare.
I very much want to encourage the formation of more faith-based groups like this and will now have to do some serious work on this. The need is greater than my church and I can respond to adequately. I've decided to write a manual/guide as a tool for churches who wish to do what we have done. But to do a proper job of this I will have to try and get some funding from an organization that shares my vision. I'm working on that.
Please help me pray that I will find a way to spread the Living Room concept to other areas. People who suffer from mood disorders need to have a place where they can get support from others who share their faith in God. It is important to have a place where they discuss both: their mental health issues as well as how God works in their life.
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
Mental health week at church
This Sunday's church service is one I very much look forward to. In honor of Mental Health Week (May 7 - 13) our pastor will present a sermon with the title "Out of the Shadows." He will talk about being a caring community for those who are dealing with mental health problems. Three of the members of our Living Room group will talk about their experience with depression and bipolar disorder.
I am so very grateful to have this pastor who has been enthusiastic to learn about mental health problems. He is eager to help in any way he can to provide a church that will give a Christ-like response to those dealing with such problems. Because of his encouragement, and the encouragement of others in the church, Living Room came about and has become a thriving support program, one that is now benefitting over 25 individuals. This support provided me with the courage to facilitate the group.
It is the love and support of this church community, as well as the inspiration provided by Pastor Don's weekly sermons, that encouraged me to write my book, A Firm Place to Stand.
What my pastor and my church, Brentwood Park Alliance Church, is doing to be supportive of people with mental health issues is an example of how well followers of Christ can be of help. For a Christian who struggles with such problems there is nothing as important (next to medication, that is). When I struggle with depression I know there are friends who will be there for me and pray for me. I know they won't be judgmental or say that I'm not right with God. That is great comfort.
If you are reading this and would like to attend our mental health service this Sunday (May 6th) you would be very welcome. The address is 1410 Delta Avenue, Burnaby (close to Brentwood Mall). Service starts at 10:30. And there is no need to dress up.
I am so very grateful to have this pastor who has been enthusiastic to learn about mental health problems. He is eager to help in any way he can to provide a church that will give a Christ-like response to those dealing with such problems. Because of his encouragement, and the encouragement of others in the church, Living Room came about and has become a thriving support program, one that is now benefitting over 25 individuals. This support provided me with the courage to facilitate the group.
It is the love and support of this church community, as well as the inspiration provided by Pastor Don's weekly sermons, that encouraged me to write my book, A Firm Place to Stand.
What my pastor and my church, Brentwood Park Alliance Church, is doing to be supportive of people with mental health issues is an example of how well followers of Christ can be of help. For a Christian who struggles with such problems there is nothing as important (next to medication, that is). When I struggle with depression I know there are friends who will be there for me and pray for me. I know they won't be judgmental or say that I'm not right with God. That is great comfort.
If you are reading this and would like to attend our mental health service this Sunday (May 6th) you would be very welcome. The address is 1410 Delta Avenue, Burnaby (close to Brentwood Mall). Service starts at 10:30. And there is no need to dress up.
Thursday, April 26, 2007
Feeling no shame, in spite of...
At Living Room tomorrow I'm going to open a discussion on stigma and how it has - or has not - affected us. I'm sure everyone will have stories: times they've been hurt or misunderstood.
I've said it before here: stigma is the greatest enemy of those who live with mental illness. I believe that it often causes us greater suffering than the symptoms of our disease. If we were understood and given love and support, our illness would be easier to bear. And if society did not harbor such a stigma, many more would accept the medical care they need. There would be no need hide their suffering.
I came to terms with the stigma element years ago when I decided to come out and write about my bipolar disorder. I don't internalize the stigma; I don't feel shame. At times I notice I'm shunned a bit by others, but it doesn't bother me (I don't think). I accept that this is the way things are...for now. But I won't accept that this is the way it should always be. We have to fight for a change in attitude towards mental illness. Only then will the lives of those who have to live with it improve.
I lost a dear friend when I came out. He thought my illness should remain hidden. It shouldn't be talked about. He now won't speak to me when I see him. He is a wise and loving man otherwise. I guess that's what hurts most. But I'm not sorry for speaking out. He is in the wrong. I know that what I'm doing is helping many.
Neat thing about coming out is that I have nothing to hide. After I started writing about it, my life became - quite literally - an open book. This is very freeing. I've never been sorry about doing that. And I'm grateful that my life situation is such that I can afford to be open. Since I don't have to work I don't have to worry about employers finding out.
Most of the people at my church know that I have bipolar disorder. In spite of that, I have many friends there and receive much love and support. It's good to know I can tell them when I'm not well and ask for prayer. My pastor has done all he can to learn about mood disorders and attends our Living Room group meetings. On May 6th he will give a sermon about mental illness, something he has never done before. If only all church goers who suffer from mental health problems could get this kind of support!
I've said it before here: stigma is the greatest enemy of those who live with mental illness. I believe that it often causes us greater suffering than the symptoms of our disease. If we were understood and given love and support, our illness would be easier to bear. And if society did not harbor such a stigma, many more would accept the medical care they need. There would be no need hide their suffering.
I came to terms with the stigma element years ago when I decided to come out and write about my bipolar disorder. I don't internalize the stigma; I don't feel shame. At times I notice I'm shunned a bit by others, but it doesn't bother me (I don't think). I accept that this is the way things are...for now. But I won't accept that this is the way it should always be. We have to fight for a change in attitude towards mental illness. Only then will the lives of those who have to live with it improve.
I lost a dear friend when I came out. He thought my illness should remain hidden. It shouldn't be talked about. He now won't speak to me when I see him. He is a wise and loving man otherwise. I guess that's what hurts most. But I'm not sorry for speaking out. He is in the wrong. I know that what I'm doing is helping many.
Neat thing about coming out is that I have nothing to hide. After I started writing about it, my life became - quite literally - an open book. This is very freeing. I've never been sorry about doing that. And I'm grateful that my life situation is such that I can afford to be open. Since I don't have to work I don't have to worry about employers finding out.
Most of the people at my church know that I have bipolar disorder. In spite of that, I have many friends there and receive much love and support. It's good to know I can tell them when I'm not well and ask for prayer. My pastor has done all he can to learn about mood disorders and attends our Living Room group meetings. On May 6th he will give a sermon about mental illness, something he has never done before. If only all church goers who suffer from mental health problems could get this kind of support!
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
Living Room recommended
My second post in one day. First time I've done that, but this is less personal in nature.
Yesterday I had a call from a therapist who wanted to know about Living Room, the faith-based support group I facilitate. He wants to send his Christian clients to us because so often they feel that being depressed means that they're bad Christians. They also don't want to take medication. Living Room is a Christian group that draws from the Bible and recognizes the medical nature of mood disorders.
This points out once more how important faith-based support is. I'm delighted that a health professional is recommending our group. Delighted and - the more this sinks in - enthused. Yes...me...enthused. I have much to be grateful for. And Living Room has given me nothing but joy.
Yesterday I had a call from a therapist who wanted to know about Living Room, the faith-based support group I facilitate. He wants to send his Christian clients to us because so often they feel that being depressed means that they're bad Christians. They also don't want to take medication. Living Room is a Christian group that draws from the Bible and recognizes the medical nature of mood disorders.
This points out once more how important faith-based support is. I'm delighted that a health professional is recommending our group. Delighted and - the more this sinks in - enthused. Yes...me...enthused. I have much to be grateful for. And Living Room has given me nothing but joy.
Saturday, April 14, 2007
What joy!
Yesterday we had a meeting of our Living Room support group. And once more, as always, I had such a wonderful feeling after - a quietly joyful feeling (I like to call it "holy joy"). And that feeling is still somewhat with me, though of course, gradually fading. But I'm happy and positive and I value that, especially after some of the hard times I've had recently.
Twelve of us were in attendance. I don't know if I've ever described our setting here so will do it here: We try to make things as warm and cozy as we can, though we meet in a big church hall. We place three long tables together to make a square table, cover it with a table cloth and place a candelabra with four candles in the center. Everyone helps themselves to lunch as they arrive then sit at the table and visit until the meeting is ready to begin. There are always dishes of chocolates handy. Yesterday we munched on Kisses: milk chocolate and "healthy" dark chocolate ones.
We start out with prayer, then discuss something that arises from Scripture - some topic that has a bearing on what we experience with our moods - often the Psalms (because I believe David was one of us). Yesterday we discussed love and whether we're able to give and receive love when we're depressed. I was pleased because almost everyone contributed to the discussion - even our pastor, Don, someone who usually tries to keep a low profile.
Then, after a break and helping ourselves to more food, we split into two groups where members have an opportunity to talk about what is happening in their lives and any struggles they might be having. At the end we pray for each individual present.
Living Room is a safe, loving, Christian place for people to receive encouragement and find out they're not alone. I'm very happy with how my dream is turning out and want to encourage other churches to offer this kind of self-help group. It's a great way for churches to do something to support those with mood disorders.
This weekend I will work on an article about Living Room for BC Christian News, a paper that goes to all the churches in this area.
Twelve of us were in attendance. I don't know if I've ever described our setting here so will do it here: We try to make things as warm and cozy as we can, though we meet in a big church hall. We place three long tables together to make a square table, cover it with a table cloth and place a candelabra with four candles in the center. Everyone helps themselves to lunch as they arrive then sit at the table and visit until the meeting is ready to begin. There are always dishes of chocolates handy. Yesterday we munched on Kisses: milk chocolate and "healthy" dark chocolate ones.
We start out with prayer, then discuss something that arises from Scripture - some topic that has a bearing on what we experience with our moods - often the Psalms (because I believe David was one of us). Yesterday we discussed love and whether we're able to give and receive love when we're depressed. I was pleased because almost everyone contributed to the discussion - even our pastor, Don, someone who usually tries to keep a low profile.
Then, after a break and helping ourselves to more food, we split into two groups where members have an opportunity to talk about what is happening in their lives and any struggles they might be having. At the end we pray for each individual present.
Living Room is a safe, loving, Christian place for people to receive encouragement and find out they're not alone. I'm very happy with how my dream is turning out and want to encourage other churches to offer this kind of self-help group. It's a great way for churches to do something to support those with mood disorders.
This weekend I will work on an article about Living Room for BC Christian News, a paper that goes to all the churches in this area.
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