Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Up and down I go

It seems as if every experience with episodes is unique. I don't think I've ever had the kinds of ups and downs I have had recently. I go from a normal state one day to being stuck in a dark pit the next. Don't know what to make of it but know I need to remember that every day is a new one. Yesterday I was ready to throw in the towel; this morning I was making plans for a new creative project. I've learned that I must take advantage of motivation when it comes to me - do when I can do and value that time. I long ago learned not to take my well times for granted.

Part of my problem, I'm sure, has been that I no longer have a book to pour all this into. For over two years the book allowed me to make something good come out of the bad. As I went through whatever mood was upon me I wrote about it and about what helped me cope - in an inspirational way, in hopes of encouraging bipolar readers. My suffering had a purpose and that made it bearable.

But this morning I thought more about an idea that has been a glimmer in the back of my mind. I'm thinking of producing inspirational booklets for people with depression. Don't know exactly how I'm going to do it or what will go into it. I do know I'd like to include black and white photographs - black and white being my favorite medium. This would be a way of combining the two loves of my life, photography and writing. The ideas are happily simmering in my mind. They give me a hopeful feeling, a bright feeling.

This is how my creativity comes about - out of the black times. Guess depression IS good for something, isn't it? After the winter, new fresh growth for the spring. How beautiful!

Happy Easter time everyone!!


Dream Writer said...

I think that it is a great idea. In fact you should have a book that has ONLY your photographs in it like a Coffee Table Book with maybe a quote below each picture.

I want to do booklets as well that will coincide with my 2nd book.

Oh, The possibilities are endless!

marja said...

I've said it before, Dream. You're my kind of girl.

Susan Bernard said...

Dear Marja,
I, too, have bipolar disorder and really believe in inspirational stories. Perhaps we could link blogs. Mine is


Bipolar Wellness Seeker said...

Thanks so much for your posts. I agree with all you said and I appreciate your comments! What I've learned is that it doesn't matter what method of healing works. It's all about approaching the illness in a positive way, believing in wellness, and maintaining hope! I do like Rev. Boyd's comments and genuinely enjoyed his book.


misha said...

your photos are beautiful so i'm sure that even that aspect would be beneficial.

Amateur Dancer said...

Hi Marja,

I wondered if you were feeling blue b/c of the recent completion of your book.

That was such a finish that HUGE project (a 'normal" be expected...)

What an AMAZING GOAL to reach...

So, are in that time of "waiting" for God to show you what He has next...

And as We ALLLLLLLLLLLLLL know...that Waiting period, is the hardes period of all (even when you read the waiting posts on my bipolar and leukemia blogs...the waiting was the not know what was next)....

Just to know what is behind God's next plan for you, that is the part we All want...because that is so exciting!

You have So much to give marja and Such creative energy, as well as spiritual depth, emotional lessons that you have learned which will continue to help others.

I know that God will use all of these to His glory and to help others....

The questions: What can you do, each day, to pass the time, enjoying this period of "waiting" for His the next step to be unveiled?

I would love it if you did a book of your photos!!